Acceptance…
18th March 2025
Hello my most beautiful and precious starshine,
I’ve been kicking myself since November, wondering if I could’ve changed what I’d said or how I was, in order to help you and perhaps avoid what happened at the end. I’m now realising that it’s unlikely I could’ve said, done or changed anything. Your contact really helped me see this. Thank you so much my lovely {} xxx
I hoped by talking about what happened, we could put safety measures in place to help both of us, especially with the triggers. I just wanted to help, I really did, but of course it’s not as simple as that. These things are extremely complex and run very deeply, and needs to be handled with so much care. I also know that safety comes first. I’m so sorry for thinking that I might be able to help in some way. I truly am.
I’m only just really beginning to understand the complexities of childhood trauma, and its effects, especially unconsciously. I feel I only know a fraction of it. I really wish things were simple and could be fixed easily. Magic wand comes to mind.
Acceptance is helping. It’s still painful but it’s easing along with the tears. I no longer feel in turmoil regarding our last few days. I still love you and I miss you with all my heart, I really do {} xxxx