Couldn’t Escape It…
18th December 2024
It finally hit me tonight. The feelings of abandonment. I do understand everything, I honestly do, but I don’t think it’s possible to escape these feelings completely. This is something I will work on in therapy. I know it’ll be okay afterwards, and these feelings won’t stay with me.
I now fully understand why in therapy, you have a period of time to say goodbye to the therapist. It’s to avoid an abrupt end and feeling abandoned again.
I know the fear of abandonment, especially by someone we love, would naturally be within both of us. It makes me understand why you might’ve needed to end our friendship even more. I know it was you who ended it, but I really do hope you are okay my lovely, and it hasn’t brought up any of those feelings {} xxx
I have these feelings of abandonment with you in the present, but as you know, in the past I’ve felt it much later. I also remember not always knowing where it was coming from because so much time had passed, and it was in fragments.