Emotional Intimacy…
1st October 2025
Good morning my most beautiful and precious starshine,
I really hope you’re okay my lovely, and you slept well and very restfully {} xxx It’s a beautiful day with sunshine. I hope you enjoyed their bright company with coffee.
I hope you’re having a really good start, it’s not too full on and you’re very happy with how everything is going {} xx
It’s 12:12. I saw this great video from the BBC Archive about how the older generation viewed men with long hair in 1967. I thought you might enjoy it. There’s also a glimpse of David Gilmour, just before he joined Pink Floyd.
I’m still struggling badly and my battery’s not recharging, but I can watch things even when my brain isn’t working. This is an improvement. Are you watching The House of Guinness? I’ve just finished watching it and really enjoyed it. I hope you do too if you watch it. I won’t spoil anything. I know the the reviews from Ireland are extremely scathing. I guess this one is a bit like marmite.
I got my CT scan results yesterday. There are two fibroids, 1.6cm and 3.7cm. It’s the larger one that’s pushing into my womb, and causing the bleeding. The best option is to remove it. The myomectomy will be done with an endoscopy, so it’s less risky. I should get the details and date soon.
I do feel a bit scared in case anything goes wrong. The other option would be a hysterectomy, which I don’t want. I could continue as I am. The bleeding has reduced a lot since the iron infusions and the tranexamic tablets, but I bleed for up to three weeks, so it’ll affect my iron and haemoglobin levels over time again.
They also spotted something not right with a lower spine disc, but I’ll need a more detailed MRI of my spine. My gynaecologist is kindly passing me onto a spinal neurosurgeon. I’m in no pain with my back, so it’s absolutely fine.
This is wishful thinking, but I wonder if the disc might be affecting my autonomic nervous system in some way. Sadly some trials for Long COVID haven’t gone too well. There’s going to be a very long wait for treatments.
Liron’s made my afternoon. She’s making scrambled eggs with your very special ingredient {} xxx I don’t think I’ve had it this year. I’m really excited and looking forward to it. Yummy, yummy, yummy!!
It’s 12:42. You’ll soon be enjoying your scrumptious lunch as well. Wonderful! You and your sweet tum must be looking forward to it, as well as your much needed break. Thoroughly enjoy it for me too my lovely {} xx
I do miss you. I try not to think about it, and I try to convince myself that it’s okay, but you’re always with me. The sharp pain in my heart, which catches me off guard, also reminds me. I know I’ve said this before, the only other person I’ve felt this way with is my mum. I know I’d be the same if I was to lose Liron. I guess it’s natural.
The three of you are the closest I’ve ever been to with anyone. I have no doubt, regardless of whether or not you’d like to resume our friendship, you’ll always be a part of me, and you’ll always be deeply loved and cherished. You do mean the world to me {} xxxx
I started reading Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson. I’ve only read the first chapter a few months ago, but it’s an excellent book and beautifully written with compassion. It does resonate, and I think the majority of people will be able to resonate with it in one way or another as well.
They talk about emotional intimacy, which is having someone who you can tell anything and everything to, including the things we love and our feelings. It’s the result of feeling completely safe with someone. I have this with you, Liron and my mum. I felt and feel seen by all of you. You saw me as I really am and accepted me. I know I couldn’t have reciprocated this with my mum, but I hope I have been able to with you and Liron, even if it’s a tiny bit. I really hope so {} xxx
It’s 14:06. I hope you and your sweet tum are very happy. Sun’s needed to have a rest. I’m going to join them.
Take the greatest care of yourself my lovely, and have a wonderful afternoon. I hope it flies by and you’re home very soon.
Once everything is done at home, sit back, relax and enjoy the most beautiful, restful and fun evening, doing the things you love {} xx Please be kind and gentle with yourself, and give yourself lots of love and care for me too {} xxx
It’s 14:14. I love you and I’m sending you all my love, with the biggest and tightest of magical healing and comforting bear hugs, covered in kisses. They’ll wrap themselves around you {} xxxx
It’s 18:34. Someone posted Wax’s Bridge to Your Heart. I haven’t heard it for years. It’s great and it has lifted my spirits. I love the video. I hope you enjoy revisiting it as well my precious sweetheart {} xxx
Rest well my lovely, and enjoy nourishing your beautiful heart with lots of delicious goodies. I’m hugging you through my phone {} xxxx
I was brushing my teeth, and out the blue I started to hear you play and sing This One. You were playing and singing it so beautifully {} xx It’s 21:21. Sleep well and sleep restfully my lovely, with sweet dreams for both of us {} xxx