I Wanted to Say Hello…
8th May 2025
Hello my most beautiful and precious starshine,
I almost sent you a message to say hello around 3.30pm today. I really want to. I will when I’ve worked through everything. I need to get out of this triggered state. I’m so sorry it’s going to take a very long time. I’m keeping everything crossed you are reading these letters. I really hope so {} xxx
There’s a part of me that would like to know if you’d rather not hear from me again. That uncertainty will remain until I do get in touch with you. I imagine you must’ve felt that uncertainty when you contacted me as well. I’m so sorry for that, and I can’t tell you how deeply sorry and sad I am for how it turned out. I truly am {} It sadly wasn’t the right time.
I am in a much better state with you than I was then. I can tell with how I’m writing to you now. It feels more normal. I feel like my normal self with you, but I’m still a very long way from where I need to be with myself. I am a huge mess at the moment and everything feels so overwhelming, including this illness.
We have our inspection tomorrow. As usual, it’s likely I will crash badly straight after. I’ll write as soon as I can my lovely {} xx
It’s 4.59pm. I really hope you’ll be leaving very soon and it’s not a late finish. Get home quickly and safely my precious sweetheart, and have a wonderful, relaxing and restful evening. Here’s Continuum 2 by Nala Sinephro. I hope you enjoy winding down with her {} xxx
I would love to know what songs you’re playing at the moment. Have tons of fun playing your gorgeous heart out for me too my lovely. Take it gently with lots of love and care for me. I’m hugging you with the warmest of magical healing love {} xxxx