Some Certainty in Uncertainty…
24th June 2026
Hello my most beautiful and precious starshine {} xxx
I really wish I could write to you directly. I almost did. I don’t know what to do. Liron said that it’s over for her as well if her rights go, and she feels a constant threat. She doesn’t want to live in fear, and she doesn’t want to keep moving. No country’s safe because things are changing so rapidly.
I was shocked to hear that Portugal has flipped. They’re doing exactly the same as here with immigration and transgender people.
Liron was shocked when she went to a protest with her sister-in-law, in Frankfurt. They’re cutting funding across the board, including education. Shockingly, it’s much worse than here. It’s always been the other way around, but not anymore.
Liron made it to Brighton today. The train from here to Marylebone was absolutely fine, but the trains from London to Brighton were all cancelled due to the heat. She thankfully got there safely via Croydon.
She’s a delegate for Unite, at the TUC LGBTQ+ conference. They’ll be setting out proposals for LGBTQ+ rights in the workplace over the next two days, which will then be put to a vote at the main TUC conference later this year.
She hasn’t given up. She’ll continue fighting, but it’s me who feels the end is now inevitable. Labour aren’t going to change anything when it comes to trans people. They’re refusing to debate the EHRC’s guidance. They’re pushing it through, despite knowing the great harm and confusion it causes.
With Labour, Tories and Reform against trans people, the chances of it being safe here is tiny.
Liron’s such an amazing person and beautiful soul. She has so much going for her, so much she can do, enjoy, and so much to give. She also has a brilliant brain. It feels like such a waste. It’s different for me because I am severely ill, and I can’t even look after myself. I can’t do much.
Despite this, I don’t want to die so soon. I don’t want Liron to die so soon either. She has a full life to live, if she’s allowed to.
Realistically, we have four years. We’ll know for sure at the next election, then it’ll take a year sorting everything and saying our goodbyes. We really don’t want to go, but we don’t a choice.
It’s really hit me today, and I do feel distressed. I am mentally preparing for the end now. Hope has gone…
I’m worried in case I never get to give you your special you day gift, from last year. That was a very special day, and I couldn’t stop myself. One of the three things was definitely meant for you. I was just the go-between.
This thought prompted me to start designing packaging for that one item. As I was looking for some paper, I came across a book I bought for a friend. I never had the chance to give it to them. They turned out to be very toxic, and it ended abruptly.
It’s completely different with you {} xx I really do need to send them to you. You can do as you please with them. It’s absolutely fine. It’s just the timing. I don’t know the best time.
I’d love to send them to you right now, but I’m still fucked up. It wouldn’t be safe for either of us because of the triggers. I don’t want to mess anything up, if there’s any chance with our precious friendship {} xx I don’t know what to do. I really wish I could speak with you {} xxx