Sweet and Savoury Carrots…
21st April 2026
Hello my most beautiful and precious starshine,
It’s 14:36. I imagine you thoroughly enjoyed your scrumptious lunch with sunshine, and you’re both very happy. How are you my lovely? I really do hope you’re okay and it’s not non-stop for you. I imagine sunshine’s brightness is helping as well {} xxx
Have you eaten a flan de carottes? Someone posted a recipe of it and I thought of you xx If you have, what does it taste like? Do you like it? The savoury taste of gruyère cheese with the sweetness of carrot must be lovely, and I imagine the nutmeg adds warmth to it.
It reminded me of an Indian carrot pudding. I couldn’t remember its name, but Google quickly helped. It’s called gajar ka halwa. Have you ever tried it? I remember enjoying it at home. Unlike flan de carottes, it’s just sweetness with carrots, ghee, milk, sugar, cardamom and nuts. I remember peeling cardamoms at home.
It’s 14:41. I’m still always reminded of you xx I’m beginning to understand that everything was born out of safety with you, which is wonderful, precious and so important. It was the same with my mum and with Liron.
I am consciously trying to make myself feel safe. Hopefully it’ll become natural and automatic with time. This is part of rewiring the automatic neurological pathways, which developed in response to the years of trauma. Telling myself it’s not you during my triggered states, is also a part of the rewiring process.
I’m also understanding that how I am, how I react, my anxious states, are all very natural and normal with the experiences I’ve had. I’m not mad or going crazy. It’s the damaging effects of the of trauma. I’m getting there, little by little.
I’m so shattered. The fluey symptoms aren’t as severe today, but my eyes are still extremely sore and painful. They need rest and lots of eye drops.
I will need to push myself to get my haircut tomorrow, otherwise with the other medical appointments, I’m looking at June. I don’t think hair can wait that long. Hopefully it won’t take too long to come out of the crash. I know I’m going to have an almighty one after the house inspection next week.
I hope the afternoon flies by and you’ll be home very soon. It’s 15:01. Thoroughly enjoy savouring your beautiful quiet moment with coffee. They’ll give you lots of warm hugs and kisses from both of us {} xx
It’s 15:15. Take the greatest and gentlest care of yourself my beautiful sweetheart {} xx Sun’s looking forward to coming home with you. Enjoy the most gorgeous, relaxing and fun evening together. Please give yourself an extra special treat for me {} xxx
I’m sending you tons and tons of love, with the biggest and tightest of magical healing and protective bear hugs, covered in sunshine kisses. Rest well my lovely {} xxxx
It’s 15:51. ELO’s Strange Magic just popped up. It has made me smile and I thought of you xx I really hope it will be okay. I hope so {} xxx