Some Cheer…
5th July 2025
Hello my most beautiful and precious starshine,
It’s 15.51, I hope you’re having the most fantastic and exciting day. I hope you loved the rugby earlier. Cricket’s on too, and the next game starts in twenty minutes. I imagine you’re all having a lot fun. Brilliant! {} xxx
I’m extremely sorry for sounding so bleak yesterday. I meant what I said, but I know I am in a badly triggered state as well. This makes me fear the worst. It’s the trigger from the medical examination. I’m still handling it better than before. I just feel extremely lost and emotional. I’m struggling to focus and I’m doing my best to push down my emotions. They’ll explode in therapy on Monday.
A couple of things cheered me up today. The first was the return of a long hauler on Twitter. John Kennedy was there from the beginning, and he helped bring everyone in the Long COVID community together. It was really lovely but everything changed when Elon took over. People got lost, people were getting nasty comments and there was more anger. John left. He was the glue.
As you know I don’t have the energy to interact with anyone, but seeing his post today felt like seeing a friend.
He always reminded me of you with his optimism, sensitivity, care, humour and wit. He brought everyone together. He’s an Irish musician and writer. Everyone loves him, in the same way everyone loves you. Some people have a natural way of having a positive impact on people’s lives without even being aware of it. You’re one of them {} xxx
It’s great to hear he’s recovering well and that he no longer crashes, which is a huge thing. He also said he has a second chance at life, which is wonderful. My second chance was when I did the HND Fine Art course, and everything that came with it and followed it. I hope I strike it lucky and get a third chance.
I don’t know how far I can improve. My calmer autonomic nervous system is giving me some hope, but I don’t know if this is temporary. Realistically, I feel having peace with my past will be my third chance at life.
I really do hope I can have a second chance with you and our precious friendship {} xxx
It’s 16.16 and the game’s begun. I’m keeping everything crossed for you and Italy and then Ireland later. Enjoy my lovely {} xx
Liron went to The Edge for a self-defence class today. It’s more about de-escalating a potentially dangerous situation. It was the first day and she really enjoyed it. I searched for The Edge and found it’s Friction Arts. My memory must be going. I’m sure I know it.
They had a workshop in June run by Albert Smith called Undertales. This was the second thing that brought a cheer. Albert’s exploring the relationship between people and their underwear. He’s absolutely right, our underwear does change depending on where we are in life. They are an extension of our clothing, but I feel they probably reveal more than our clothing.
He’s also right in saying that they can tell us the relationship we have with our bodies. I’ve been going through this since last year. Our external clothing can express our personalities, but it doesn’t necessarily reveal how we truly feel and how we see ourselves.
The workshop enabled people to tell stories and make boxer shorts, which then went on a touring exhibition. I think it’s such a lovely idea.
It’s 17.00, I’ve just looked at the score. I really do hope Italy can turn it around.
Despite the blood loss over the last few weeks, I am looking healthier than I have been. The iron infusion is definitely helping. I think I will be well enough to finally get my hair cut on Wednesday. I do need to rest properly though. Fluey crash symptoms are still there but I’m sitting up a bit more. It’s automatic. Our bodies do know what it can and can not do.
Miracles do happen and I hope there’ll be another one when I do contact you directly {} xxx Mary Beth Maziarz’s beautiful, and I feel melancholic, rendition of Day Dream Believer comes to mind.
Take it gently my lovely and continue enjoying every single exciting moment for me too. I hope your precious heart is beaming with lots of love, joy, sunshine and magic {} xx
I’m thinking of you and sending you tons and tons of love, with the biggest and tightest of magical healing and protective bear hugs, bursting with kisses {} xxxx